Zombified, But Coming Back to Life

Cassi - basically from your post I was overwhelmed with excitedness and funness :) I am happy that you are doing so many wonderful and neat things :) Your apartment and your friends sound like such a blessing. I am happy for you :) Your prank war sounds totally rockin', but that dude is pretty lame for being a party pooper, just sayin'. I'd love to do a prank war with peoples for sure!

Jenny - wow I am sorry that things are so stressful for you. That is a handful most definitely. I'll be praying for school that it would lighten up. And I'll be praying for your patience with your relationship with Sam. I understand that frustration and I pray that you'll find comfort in your dating :) You know, the beginning of this year I was overwhelmed with all these people getting engaged and married and it seemed everything was throwing this idea of marriage on me. It was one day when Zach snuggled me during a movie that I looked at him and realized, I love dating him. And the thought came to me, we get to spend "all" our lives married, but we only have this time of dating once. You can never go back to it. So, maybe as some comfort to you, think of that. Enjoy each moment and cherish it. And maybe try to think of it from that perspective - I think it really helped for me :) As for the situation with your roomie, goodness what a toughie. I pray that you'll have patience with her and also encouragement despite your stress. I know that it's especially hard to want to come to her and talk but to find that you end up helping her instead. But Jenny, I know that by you being there and listening to her (even if it's the same thing over and over and by her own choices) you're being a great encouragement. She'll look back and be so appreciative I am sure. :) Hang in there. Congrats on being "regular" baha! But really, that is so good!

Now as for me....goodness where do I begin? This year has been the toughest yet. I think the best way to sum up how I've felt is - weak and zombified. 4-5 hours of sleep every night, severe nausea and stomach pain, 8 hour work shifts, and full class load. Those are the tough parts. I've considered possibly quitting Tim Horton's simply because I want to focus more on school. But I need to pay rent as well and I like paying off my loan early :) I do enjoy working there though most of the time. School has been rather rough. Honestly, I'm behind in my work and it's eating me alive. (maybe literally, Zach thinks I have an ulcer, hence my nausea and pain and difficulty eating much food). I'm slowly getting back on track what with having an extra day off work every week (I definitely think that was a God thing because my boss gave me a day off work every week without me saying anything). Aside from my personal "choice" stress, Zach has had an extremely rough year as well. His "friends" have not been great comforts and have actually been saying really not cool things to him. He's literally just been broken this year, so that's been really tough seeing him hurting and not being able to fix it. I, too, understand what Jenny was saying about your friends really just not understanding you. All the friends I had prior to this year have kind of gone to the backburner. I still love and care for them of course, but we don't really connect as much. My one friend (who is Zach's ex) is back to ignoring me and has starting glaring at him....not sure what sparked that. It's spread to her dormmates. Which is really sad honestly. I was having kind of a rough time not having any girlfriends I can go to on campus. There wasn't a single one I felt I could call up and just say hey and ask them to pray for me. Not even having to talk or give details, just a simple, hey could you be thinking of me. That was hard. But you know...God is good. :) I recently met two girls here who have added a spark to my life. They are literally in the exact same boat as me when it comes to relationships - down almost to the nitty gritty. They also have different "flavors" that really encourage me to be more adventurous again. I've been missing that. They got me to go to Zumba and let me tell you ladies - it kicked my butt. Two nights later and my thighs are SORE. Squats did me in. But I love love love it. I think we should start our own personal POG class on breaks :) My goal is to whip my body in shape big time. I've been slacking. haha. Also, I recently learned some really really tough news. I don't feel at liberty to share, but just be thinking/praying for me that I'd look past the circumstance and always see the good. That I wouldn't ever see the people involved in any less of a light and to love them still the same. And to also not be haunted by this news as the days progress that instead I could come to forget about it and move on. It's going to be tough at times, it already has been to not let it come into my mind, but slowly but surely I know it's working. The good things in my life have been the small details that just really comfort me. Like taking care of Cindy, the woman who let me live in her home. She had surgery and to be able to care for such a tough, not liking to rest, but still such loving woman is such a blessing to me. I also got to play hide n seek with Hannah, one of the daughters and her friend. And Zach....gosh. I'm learning so much still about his heart. I was in class all day Friday after Cindy had her surgery and so Zach came right on over and sat on the couch with her. I come home to find them both fast asleep on the couch. His heart is so giving (sometimes to a fault haha). And he's so tender about things. He really does have the sweetest heart. I really hope that I can always come to appreciate it and never take it for granted. Okay, I'll stop the mushy gushy ;) Well I'm just gonna head into more.

I love you all. I hope to hear from those who haven't written yet. I'm so thankful for each of you and the wonderful blessing you have brought in my life. :) You each have a certain spark in my heart. Haha...I thought of a car and spark plugs and stuff. haha Weird. I appreciate that we still are friends and sharing life together. It's truly amazing. Know that I love you and think of you each day. (I'm always telling fun stories about all of you haha). With Love.